Going on 35

Going on 35.

Marriage is supposed to be difficult.

We are supposed to get it wrong. Being wrong allows us to grow. If we never made mistakes, we would never learn more about one another or ourselves. We would never truly need the love on which our relationship is based. There are times in which I will try to read my spouse's mind and shouldn't. There will be other times in which she tries to read my mind and will get it wrong. When tension is caused because we can't read each other's minds, the frustration should quickly change to laughter because we realize we are trying to do something which is not possible.

Cindy and I would love to be that couple who completely understand each other with such depth that we can complete each other's sentences and know what the other person thinks before they even say it. Because we want to be that couple, we do everything to share our minds, hearts and feelings. Becoming that couple is not something that happens when a couple falls in love; it is a byproduct of a lifetime of communication, shared experiences and learning to understand one another. This month we will be celebrating 35 years of marital bliss, so I think we're close.

Side-note to men -- If you are wondering how you can convince your wife to let you play golf on your anniversary, you can't.

It's not my job to read my spouse's mind. It's my job to share my mind with my spouse and to listen to my spouse as she shares her mind.

Have you ever said to yourself, "if only I knew God's thoughts?"

We go to great lengths to bring God down to our level, to make Him finite so we can understand His ways and plans -- to read God's mind. I am grateful that we serve a God who is so big that He is beyond our understanding. I believe that God wants us in a frame of mind where we know He is leading. Most of us don't even know our own hearts. Our ways are not His ways. Hopefully, this will help you recognize some of the "disconnects" that interfere with your efforts to enjoy abundant living. I don't think I'll ever get the mind reading thing down, but I'm trying.

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Editor's note: The Rev. Dr. Scott Stewart is the pastor of Pea Ridge United Methodist Church and Brightwater Methodist Church. The opinions expressed are those of the writer. He can be contacted at [email protected] or 479-659-9519.