OPINION: Train up a child in the way he should go

Parenting is a high calling. During the summer months, when children are out of school, there are many excellent opportunities to further our bonding with and training of our children.

Parenting is not just providing a house, food, clothes. There are far too many children harmed by negligence -- by parents who just leave them to entertain themselves without any guidance or directions.

Although we may form -- or break -- habits at any period of our life, childhood is the time habits are most easily formed. A child learns through training whether to ask nicely for something desired, or to whine until he gets a response. A child learns habits of orderliness and neatness or careless and sloppiness very early.

As parents, we have a high calling to assist our children in establishing good habits early. From the earliest time, a child -- infant -- can be taught the habit of going to sleep quietly when put to bed. Although in the beginning, he will resist (cry loudly), he will soon learn, especially if his mother is quiet, patient and resolved. Children don't come here knowing what is best for them. It is our responsibility to train them and help them find their highest good.

It is a sad thing to see a household ruled by a tiny tyrant -- whether he be less than a year, a toddler or a willful youth. Many is the frazzled parent who is simply suffering what he himself has sown, if only through neglect.

Many parents complain as if they are the children and their children rule.

"But he doesn't want to take a nap," a mother cries about her infant. But every time she puts him to bed and he whimpers, she picks him up.

"He doesn't like carrots (or any vegetables)," she laments. But she lets him drink juice all day long and then wonders why he doesn't desire his meal. He sits at the table but a moment, picks at -- even throws -- his food, and then starts crying. His mother cries: "Maybe he's getting sick."

A 2-year-old, nay, a 15-month-old, can be assisted in picking up his toys when he's finished playing before he goes on to the next activity. It is a very involved time for the parents. They can not just tell the child to pick up his toys, but must work with him, constantly directing, guiding and setting the example. If a mother allows a toddler to play for hours unsupervised in his room, and then walks in to find a total wreck, she has no one to blame but herself. She can not order him to clean his room and expect it to be done.

Train your children in good habits. Teach them to be orderly. Have a place for everything (maybe he has too many things!) and always put everything in its place.

As long as mother is in the habit of picking up after him when he is young, she'll find she'll still be doing it when he is grown. (And his wife may be doing it for many years later.)

Good habits help build good character. Most of the habits governing everyday life -- cleanliness, dressing, eating, sleeping -- are formed in childhood. A habit is simply a repetitive act -- often done without thinking. Train a child in taking his dishes to the sink after a meal and he will get into the habit of it. It may take weeks or months of mother reminding him, but once it is established, it becomes a good habit.

Set a good example and persevere. They grow up all too fast.

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Editor's notes: Annette Beard is the managing editor of The Pea Ridge TIMES. She is the mother of nine children, grandmother of 12. The opinions expressed are those of the author. She can be reached at [email protected].

Editorial on 07/17/2019