Still going 'out of my mind'

"Out of my mind" was coined many years ago as a double entendre -- signifying either that I was writing about whatever came out of my mind or that I was "going out of my mind." At the time, I had many small children. I wrote the column for The Benton County Daily Record and usually addressed issues concerning parenting, although not always. Now, I still have many children, but most are no longer "children" in the age sense.

My eldest daughter turned 30 this year. My "baby" will be 13 in a couple of weeks.

The basis for this column was written nearly nine years ago when I returned to the work force after being a stay-at-home, home-educating mother.

I believe the title will still be appropriate for this column in The Times. I still am consumed by my family -- which now includes seven grandchildren. There are no vacations from parenting.

When the foundation for this column was written nine years ago, my eldest had just returned from a two-week trip to Haiti and I awaited the midnight call that she had arrived back in the country safely. While we were cold here in the middle section of our country, she was swimming outside of Port au Prince. I must admit, I've had to "eat my words," so to speak. Our teen and adult children do take time. Even when I have "days off" -- there are no days off. My cell phone rings constantly -- all the children who can drive have a cell phone. They are required to let me know when they leave and when they arrive at their destinations. It has alleviated some of the worry of young drivers. Funny though, it can backfire. Not too long ago I was eating dinner with a friend and my children, all of whom were well occupied with their own friends, called wanting to know where I was, with whom, and when I would be back. (The tables have turned!)

When the girls were small, I approached a dear older lady from church who had three teen-aged daughters. I asked her to mentor me. She agreed to pray about it, but after a while told me that she couldn't -- that she was just too busy with her children. At that time, I was perplexed -- how could teen-age children take very much time? Surely they could dress and feed themselves?! Overwhelmed with diapers, nursing baby, car seats, toddlers, I truly couldn't see that older children were also time consuming -- just in a different way. I remember dreaming of the day when all of mine could actually walk, talk, and buckle themselves in their car seats.

I'll never forget what someone told me 20 years ago: "We spend the first two years teaching them to walk and talk; and the next 16 telling them to sit down and be quiet."

Now, nine of my seven have passed into adulthood.

Years ago, I read a silly little thing about how uneducated our parents seem to us when we're in our 20s and how they amazingly grow smarter over the next few decades. Well, I'm now in the middle there -- I realize my mother did (and may yet still) know far more than that for which I gave her credit. And, my sons think I know very little. Therefore, they often think I'm going "out of my mind." So, "Out of My Mind" is still apropros.

My family has changed -- it's grown and flourished. As with children/families, our community has both roots and wings.

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Editor's note: Annette Beard is the managing editor of The Times of Northeast Benton County.

Editorial on 12/17/2014