In October of 2002 my uncle Willard passed away.
My 6-year-old niece was struggling to understand what death was and why Uncle Willard was no longer there with the family.
She especially struggled with why he just laid there in the casket and wouldn’t talk to anybody. I had just started seminary and didn’t have the words to help her in her grief. I suggested to her Grandma that she take her to see their local pastor. He explained life and death to this child in such a clear and simple way that she understood what it was all about. For the first time in my life, I understood it, too.
This is what he said to her.
“It is cold outside and that is a nice coat you are wearing. I remember last winter, and you had a different coat. What happened to that coat?”
“I don’t have it anymore,” she said. He questioned her as to why she no longer had the coat. “I outgrew it and Mommy got rid of it. I miss my old coat, but my new one is really nice.”
He then rolled up his shirt sleeve and pinched the skin on his arm and instructed Jennifer to do the same on her arm. He said, “That is skin and skin is what makes up our bodies. Skin is kind of like a coat that we wear, we call this coat our body. Inside of us is what is called a soul.
We all have one, but you can’t see it. We wear our skin to keep our soul warm and comfy and we call that life, but there comes a time when our soul outgrows our skin.”
My niece said, “You mean like how I outgrew my old coat.”
The minister said, “That is right. When you outgrew your old coat your mommy got rid of it because you didn’t need it anymore, and she got you a new coat.
Your old coat was also getting worn out. You won’t see your old coat again. It is like that when a persondies. Our soul outgrows our body that is like a coat made of skin and we no longer need that.
“Just like when your mommy got you a new coat, God gives us a new body and we don’t need the old one anymore so God gets rid of it. The old body was getting kind of worn out so God gives us a brand new one to wear. What we see in the casket is not the person we love. It is just an old coat that became worn out and the person outgrew it. The person you love is now with Jesus and he has a brand new coat to wear. You won’t get to have that person in your life anymore, just like you no longer have your old coat that you wore last year. It is OK though. When you get really sad, just think of how much you loved him and remember he has a brand new coat now and he is really proud of it. Some day you will get to see him wearing his new coat.”
Over the past 13 years of ministry, I have buried a lot of friends, family members and a few people I didn’t get the chance to know. The words this man said to my niece have helped me understand life and death and put things into perspective.
Life is more than our earthly bodies. Actually our earthly bodies are such a small part of life. It is the soul that is eternal. It is the soul that has left this world and joined our Father in Heaven and now dines at the great banquet with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
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Editor’s note: Brian Timmons is the pastor of Pea Ridge and Brightwater Methodist Churches. He can be contacted at 925-0167 or by e-mail at [email protected].
Church, Pages 2 on 06/12/2013