LITTLE ROCK — Running and I were almost seen in a knock-down, dragout Wednesday morning.

Since there is a halfmarathon in Bentonville in March, I really have no other option than to run in it.

(Like it would be an option anyway, I am a crazed addict.) So, I have found myself once again in the thick of it with my dear/horrible companion, Running.

I was really getting used to sleeping until the last minute possible before getting up for work. I was really starting to like not being made fun of because I eat like a growing boy. And, I was really liking not feeling physical pain but rather just enjoying my runs on no particular schedule. Now I’m back to 4:30 a.m. wake ups, using up every ounce of energy I consume and walking with a granny-like quality accompanied withan “ow” per step.

I read about how it’s hard to catch back up when you take a “break” for the holidays or during cold weather, but I didn’t consider my shortened, less frequent runs really taking a break. Apparently, I know nothing.

On the morning of the near fight, it was strangely warm at 5 a.m. I walked out of the house questioning my sanity when I was wearing only shin length running pants and a longsleeved shirt. Not two weeks before, as we all know, it was negative temperatures.

I’m running along in the dark, thoughts flowing but mindful of traffic of course, and after only a half-mile, it showed up - a side stitch.

Before I was such an “advanced” runner, as I like to call myself but usually don’t let anyone hear because it’s just not true, I would let a cramp in my side be an excuse to turn right around and go home.

For a while, I was even convinced I had something wrong with me and gave up running because of my “condition.” Really, I was just not in very good shape. Funny how we see thingsso clearly in hindsight.

I did my belly breathing and exhaled on the foot you’re supposed to exhale on. I’m not going to pretend the thought of grabbing my side in pain and limping back to my car didn’t cross my mind. Finally, it subsided.

And then the worst thing happened.

I don’t claim to be fast, but I can keep a good steady pace for quite a while and I usually fall in toward the middle of the group I run with and stay there. I don’t know if everyone who runs gets this feeling of madness, but I knew the sound of feet pounding behind me was the tail of the group and I knew they were closing in on me. Fast.

I pulled Running aside and got serious.

“You listen to me,” I told it, all in a matter of milliseconds, of course. “I knowyou like to wear me out just for laughs, and I know I did too many squats yesterday and you think it’s funny my quads are burning. But, make no mistake, I will not be passed by every single runner in this group and I will not finish last. You andI are going to use that awful sound of approaching strides and work together and get moving, and I don’t want to hear another word about it. Now let’s go!”

We did. And it was hard, I was sweating and struggling and if it were a movie, there would have been some great music playing I’m sure. Running cried “Stop, it hurts!” and I yelled (in my head - I don’t want anyone thinking I’m some weirdo) “Not till we’re done!” I passed someone and was flying and then I passed someone else and then I was done.

I nearly passed out while cooling down, but I got extra time to cool down since the rest of the group was so far behind by now. Well, not that far.

“Good job everyone,” the trainer said. “Keep up with your hill sprints, the last mile of the race is onesteep, long hill.”

Those who weren’t having such an off day like I was were excited by the sound of hill sprints.

If Running was, in fact, a real person, at that moment I may have run him over with my car.

Opinion, Pages 4 on 01/27/2010