PEA RIDGE — A door opens, a screen door slams. Hellos are exchanged. Squeals of recognition, expressions of delight as cousins gather for the first meeting in more than a decade.

Scrap books are pulled out, pictures examined, family trees explained. Newer members are introduced and relationships clarified.

There have been weddings, births, funerals since the last family gathering.

As the smell of roasting ham and baking potatoes wafts through the air, thewind continues to howl over the wheat and barley fields of northern Montana, never ceasing, punctuating the sing-song voices of the cousins visiting in the family room.

A year ago, I was privileged to share a visit back to the family land with adear friend. Although previously unknown to the family members, I was treated with welcoming graciousness.

As we near Thanksgiving holidays and then Christmas, we prepare for family gatherings. For some, the thought of family stirs pain instead of joy.

It’s relatively easy to look at others and think they have a better family, a better situation. Hence, the saying, “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.”

Almost everything hasboth good and bad. Rain is good, but it can bring flooding and hinder plans for outdoor activities. Sunshine is good, but it, too, can bring negative results like extreme heat and drought and sunburn.

Family is made up of imperfect, sometimes exasperating people, but family members can bring incredible joy and support.

This Thanksgiving, try focusing on the positive attributes of your family members and enjoy the time together.

Opinion, Pages 4 on 11/11/2009